Saturday, October 04, 2008

Freshly Squeezed O.J.

The economy is in shambles, we're stuck in Iraq, inflation and gas prices seek to ruin us all. But White America slept just a little better last night knowing that O.J. Simpson has been convicted on all counts in his armed robbery trial. His defense was pulped by the prosecution and the Juice will be getting pasteurized. Yes, I've got a million bad orange juice puns.

There was no other way that this was going to end and we all knew it before the ESPN ticker had gotten the words to the other side of the screen. "The Passion of the Christ" had a less telegraphed ending. Gravity is more unpredictable. White folks had never let that 1994 acquittal go and there wasn't a white person in America who didn't believe that O.J. didn't belong behind bars, so the writing was on the wall once we saw that all-white jury. O.J. shouldn't be allowed to run free after making a mockery of the justice system. That right is solely the province of white people. So the storyline going into the courtroom was pretty much the same one that the WWF had written for the Ric Flair's rematch with "Macho Man" Randy Savage: "You did it once. Now, let's see you do it again!" If Vince McMahon had been the judge, the verdict wouldn't have been more obvious.

The sad part is that O.J. was stupid enough to allow himself to be put in this situation again. Doesn't matter than one of his accusers would testify that O.J. was set up. Like Michael Jackson, O.J. Simpson forgot he was black in America, so he thought that he could walk around like everything was sweet and because he beat a murder rap, everything else was no big deal. He got off from the big one: Killing two white people. He probably tried shooting himself just to see if the bullets would bounce off.

He seemed to have forgotten how mad white people were and continue to be when it comes to the O.J. trial. I argued with a girl last year who wasn't even old enough to remember it and she firmly believed that he should be burning in Hell right now. They all say that it doesn't matter of O.J. is black; it's all about justice. Then, they defend the cops that shot Shawn Bell or think that the Jena 6 were getting what they deserved.

O.J., listen to me: White people don't like to see black people get equal treatment in this country.
I don't care what they say: When they get off, the whole thing was simply a misunderstanding that needed investigating to uncover the facts. When your black ass gets off, it's a miscarriage of justice.

Playing golf all day as part of your solemn vow to "find the real killers" is one thing. I guess you wanted to make sure that country clubs across America were safe as part of your plans to keep America safe. Sure, it was funny watching white people's heads explode, but they couldn't really do anything so you should have just quit while you were ahead. Actually trying to commit more crimes is just plain stupid, because you're not Nino Brown and even if you were, he's still going to jail for tax evasion, despite paying all of the money back.

So enjoy the life in prison that they're clearly going to stick you with, Orenthal. You're not getting out, because after 14 years of trying, they've finally gotten you where they want you. And let this be a lesson to other black people who think they're going to get off from crimes. If Michael Vick wasn't the wake-up call to you, then this verdict should be. I thought that "Never Forget" was the slogan attached to 9/11, but it seems that they were really talking about O.J. Simpson.

No comments: