Monday, April 06, 2009
Plaxico Burress is not Michael Vick
If the "Pacman Jones Memorial Award for Moron Excellence" was a real award, then Plaxico Burress would be a lock for it in 2009. Someone needs to tell him that it isn't real, and even if it was, it's nothing that smart people want to have.
Plaxico Burress has been involved with the police at least seven times since August 2008. He's been sued at least nine times since 2000. He has gun-possession charges above his head right now. So a guy like him saying, "I know the sheriff personally," isn't exactly a good thing. All that means is, he's been involved in Plaxico's arrest enough times for them to have a deep conversation.
Yet, those are the words that he chose to throw at the Broward County Deputy Sheriff who stopped him for speeding on March 18th. I guess, in Plaxico's mind, his rapport with the sheriff is going to get that speeding ticket thrown out, because being cool with the sheriff clearly means that he can act an ass whenever he wants to. He doesn't have to obey traffic laws, which is why he's had five such violations in the past month.
You know, the Duke Boys knew Sheriff Roscoe P. Coltrane personally. Didn't stop him from trying to arrest them on bootlegging charges.
Kind of makes me wonder why Plaxico never got in good with the police in New York, since he was going to carry guns around in a city that has a mandatory three year sentence for carrying guns. Maybe if he had, they wouldn't have been so quick to arrest him, because everyone knows that cops that you know personally always cover for you. Even when he's living in a fantasy land, Plaxico is still really stupid.
That's what separates Plaxico Burress from Michael Vick. I've had people tell me that New York is going to make an example out of him because he's black. I've had people tell me that Plaxico is a victim. And we need to go on and kill all that noise right now.
Michael Vick committed a crime and deserved to be punished, however, the sentence he received was viewed by many (okay, by black people) to be excessive. He killed dogs, which set off a firestorm of outrage by dog lovers everywhere and unleashed that band of lunatics known as PETA upon the sane-thinking world. Meanwhile, Leonard Little killed another human being and not only was everyone okay with it, he never even missed any playing time. It was all so logical, because as we know, dogs are worth more to people than people are.
On the other hand, Plaxico Burress shot himself in the leg in a nightclub with a gun that is illegal to have anywhere in the city, then tried to cover the whole thing up. Why he needed a gun in the club is irrelevant, because he was going to be in the VIP all night, anyway. So, unless he was afraid that the groupies that were joining him were actually terrorists, I think the bouncers at the door were enough security.
I believe that an example was made of Michael Vick and as a result, he lost everything. Plaxico Burress could have just hired bodyguards and none of this would have happened. He's had a long history of not being very bright, so let's not try to turn Plaxico into some kind of hero or political prisoner, when he's really just a guy who wasn't enough smart enough realize that sweatpants can't even hold up a cell phone, let alone a 10-pound gun.
He couldn't put out $90 for a holster. Plaxico's not gonna do three years because he's a victim; Plaxico's gonna do three years because he's simple.