Let him lose a game for you before you start being critical

Michael Vick has been an Eagle for less than 24 hours and already, the country is in an uproar. It's almost as if it flares up every time something good happens to him. He gets out of jail, but "he should still be locked up." He gets conditionally reinstated, but "he should never play again." The Eagles sign him to a one year deal, and suddenly, "The Eagles have no character."

I would think that this shows how much character the Eagles do have. What kind of message would it send if they didn't take him because, "Michael Vick isn't worthy of a second chance?" What does that say about America? I thought this country was all about second chances?

Just for the record, I don't believe that "second chance" crap at all. There are people who still haven't forgiven Metallica for cutting their hair.

But some of the things that people are saying are really ridiculous and I just don't understand them. I'm pretty sure Michael Vick doesn't understand them either, but that's what you get when you settle for a Virginia Tech education (hey-ho!). I don't speak for Vick, but I do speak for me, and methinks you sound like an idiot when you make the following statements:

"What has Michael Vick done to show that he's a changed man?"

I'm really sick of hearing this one. What has he done? He went to jail. In America, there's no "kiss-ass" clause that you have to meet before you resume your life after prison. You serve your time, you serve your probation, and you go about your business. I've never read the entire penal code before, but I'm pretty sure there's nothing in there about "groveling before a self-righteous population." If there was, we'd have higher recidivism rate than we already do.

"He hasn't shown remorse for his crimes."

First, you don't know that. It's just that when you believe it's all about you, you believe that he has to do it where you can see it. You didn't see him in jail. You don't know what he did in there or after he got out. And he doesn't owe any of you and explanation.

What are we, ostriches? It didn't happen because our heads were in the sand? Just because it didn't happen in front of you doesn't mean it didn't happen. That's like assuming that just because you didn't see the Bush Administration stealing your civil liberties doesn't mean they didn't actually do it. Meanwhile, you're sitting in jail on a "dissenting thought pattern" charge.

How do you show remorse, anyway? What, do you want him to get out there and cry? The Humane Society has already taken his money, so he can't give that away. What more do you want from him? I really don't understand what people expect him to do to "show remorse." Thing is, this is the first time anyone's ever been expected to show remorse. No one was looking for Mike Tyson to be contrite after he went to jail for rape. We just let him go right back into the ring. Are they going to ask Donte Stallworth to "show remorse" for his crime? Maybe if he got out there and softshoed for you, you'd leave him alone.

For fuck's sake, are you afraid he's going to stomp puppies into a stain for good luck before he goes onto the field?

"Playing football isn't a right; it's a privilege."

So is working at Burger King.

What if you went to jail for running a meth lab or whatever you do, and when you tried to get your job back stocking shelves at Food Depot, but they told you, "Working at Food Depot isn't a right; it's a privilege," before security escorted you out?

I don't even know what this has to do with anything. It's not like he's being disrespectful towards anyone while he tries to get his life back. He's not taking anything for granted here, because if he was, he'd be giving the world a totally different message than he is right now. He's not even a troublemaker, as troublemakers go. He's not Pacman Jones. It's just that the one time he REALLY got in trouble, he REALLY got in trouble.

"I hate Michael Vick."

I hate Kanye West, but it didn't keep "808s and Heartbreak" from going platinum. No one cares.

Look, Jesus is considered by many to be perfect, and he wouldn't piss and moan about this. You know why? Because he's all about forgiveness (and NOT judging), which is why he defended that professional snakeslurper against an angry mob. He also has scary, supernatural powers, and if I had those, I wouldn't care about your earthly affairs, either. But even he would let this go. Everyone makes mistakes, and at some point, we have to atone for those mistakes. He has. And even if you hate what he did (which you're certainly right to do), rubbing his face in it forever isn't going make things right. You're the one who's angry. He just signed a million dollar contract and is trying to atone for his sins. Hell, give him a chance to do it. Do you people ever read your Bibles?

Because at the end of the day, dude...really. It's just football.

If I Did It: The Michael Vick Edition

Michael Vick is being paid $600,000 to appear in a documentary. There is also word that he wrote a book while he was in jail and he's looking for a publishing deal. There are those who will be upset that he's looking to bank on his misfortunes. Those people need to shut up, because it's not like PETA and the ASPCA didn't make a truckload of money off of him already.

Michael Vick is millions of dollars in debt, about to be released from jail, and resigned to working a $10 an hour construction job (cheap promotion for the company, because they're not putting a backhoe in his hands) because there's no guarantee that he'll be let back in the NFL. Roger Goodell said that Vick is "going to have to demonstrate to the larger community — not just to the NFL community and to me — that he has remorse for what he did and that he recognizes mistakes that he made," which is code for "I want to see this [expletive deleted] dance for the American public," because public admittance and jail time just isn't demonstration enough.

So the fact that Vick is going to do these things is fine by me. That construction gig isn't going to pay off anything, so why not do the documentary and book? If he's smart, he'll try for a reality show that shows him playing with dogs all the time. Puppies can rehab anyone's image and America's idiots still believe that reality shows are real. He's going to need something to do until the he lands that UFL contract.

Would they prefer that Vick get out there and sell drugs or steal cars, because selling his name and image and banking on the fact that controversy sells is the only way he's getting out of this. Does anyone have the number for the company that's selling the Michael Vick chew toy? Make sure you send it to him, because I'm sure he'd be willing to endorse it at this point.

I don't think anyone in America is going to pass up $600,000 for the opportunity to walk around all day and have people point cameras at them. Some people are worried about the harm this could do to Michael Vick's image, because chances are, he won't have final cut approval on the movie. He's already been to jail for killing dogs. He's inspired people to picket places where he wasn't even going to be (Falcons' training camp, the NFL offices). He's lost endorsements, houses, cars, and his job.

I really don't think that his image can take that much more of a hit. Unless the documentary exposes his reliance on the power of Satan, I don't think he'll drop down any further in the judgmental eyes of America. And really, is there anyone who's really planning to go see this? It's not like it's going to be the redemptive and heartwarming tale of a lovable loser on his way back up. If that were the storyline, I'd go buy my tickets now. Truth to tell, we could probably use a positive story like that right about now.

It's most likely going to be something that will allow PETA supporters to bask in his misery. Watching him get the run around from his parole officer or digging holes at work or stressing about his bills, because if we've learned nothing from any of this, it's that Michael Vick KILLED DOGS and we should never forget it. Grow up, people.

If I want to watch senseless negativity, I know where Fox News is on my cable rotation.

So let him do his movie and book. If rappers can build careers on pretending to be criminals, why not give an actual criminal a shot at it?

On Michael Vick: Move the F*** On.

Michael's Vick's legal troubles have all finally been resolved and now, it's just a waiting game until he gets out of prison and starts trying to get back into the NFL. No guarantees it'll happen, though, because Roger Goodell is kind of a dick.

But even though he will have paid his debt to society (and the debt of two or three other people) when he's released from prison, and even though he's lost everything (financially speaking), that's just not good enough for some people. There are people who still say he should never be allowed back in the NFL. And that's cool, because it's their right to be stupid.

These are the people who say that playing in the NFL isn't a right. I don't even know what that's supposed to mean at this stage. Working at Burger King isn't a right, either. It's not even a foregone conclusion that he'll even get back to the NFL, but it's wrong to deny him the chance just because some people don't like what he did. Now, if he had been sitting on the sidelines smashing puppy skulls on his helmet, then yeah, I'd say that he should be gone for good. I'd also say he needed help.

But that's not what happened. Yes, he did it, admitted to doing it, and turned himself in. It's got nothing to do with football, though. And crimes away from the field or how clean someone's soul is should have nothing to do with whether or not someone should be allowed to play. People always bring up Leonard Little still being in the league after he killed A PERSON while driving drunk back in 1998. Some people even bring up Ray Lewis's murder trial. I'm going to bring up alleged drunk and rumored racist, Babe Ruth. I don't even know if that stuff is true, but if it is, and that guy's in the Hall of Fame, continues to be celebrated in America, and was immortalized through confectionary and fictional curses, then Vick should be allowed to play again.

What about all of the athletes who hit their wives? They're still allowed to play. Guys are busted for drug use or DUI or gun possession all the time. What about college athletes who steal from other students or cheat on tests? What about when they cheat on their wives? What about when they abandon their kids? Pacman Jones gets to play and he's probably choking a stripper right now. It's funny how these people who continue to judge Vick are doing it based on his crimes against dogs, but the ones who commit crimes against people are fine. The point is, a lot of these athletes are not angels. Michael Jordan is an asshole, but the Chicago Bulls didn't draft him because they thought his aura made angels weep. They drafted him because he was a monster on the basketball court. If whether or not a player was a good guy was the deciding factor to these decisions, then professional sports would be a very boring place because almost none of your favorite players would be in it.

Michael Vick made a mistake. He's paying for it and will continue to pay for it in ways that are far more hurtful than PETA picketing the next team he plays for. Let's move on, as he's trying to, and let the man live his life, whether or not that includes football. Of course, I don't expect that to happen, because we don't exactly live in a forgiving nation. They didn't let that "not guilty" verdict stand in the way of their opinion that O.J. did it.

Am I ready for the Vick Era to end?

Michael Vick’s days in the NFL could be numbered. I don’t know how I feel about it.

I know I’ve said my share of things against Michael Vick. He’s given me a lot of ammo to do it, both on and off the field. But I always held out hope that he’d get it all together. I’ve never written him off. I’ve never said that he should be cut or traded (unless it was a swap for Donovan McNabb, my favorite player. Can’t fault me for that). Now, it’s starting to seem like he’s never going to get the chance to live up to the potential, mainly because he can’t stop screwing his life up.

It frustrates me as a fan, because here is a guy who has the world in his hand. This man was the first pick in the 2001 NFL Draft. He signed a $110 million dollar contract with the Atlanta Falcons. He’s arguably the most exciting player to watch in the NFL. He’s got his own shoe from Nike. He plays the glamour position in the most popular sport in the country. He’s a starting NFL quarterback. A lot of people would stomp on their mother to live his life.

But that’s just not good enough, because this guy can’t stop being a knucklehead. And admittedly, flicking off the fans or that water bottle thing, they weren’t that bad. The Ron Mexico situation was more of a joke than anything else. Everything else that Michael Vick had done to this point really wasn’t that bad. Except for the girl he burned, he hadn’t really been out hurting people. He was just doing stupid things, things that would have blown over with time.

But this…the dog-fighting thing, it’s a serious charge. This is a felony and a federal case. And if there’s evidence against him, he’s likely going to jail. And now, all those “little things” that he had done just help paint the portrait of a man who doesn’t deserve the blessings he’s been given. His critics are louder than ever, and in the face of his indictment, it’s impossible to defend Vick. All his supporters have left is, “let’s wait until the facts come in.” His supporters sound like his lawyer during a press conference. “I am confident that when all the facts are revealed, Mr. Vick’s good name will be vindicated.”

And where does that leave me? I have been a harsh critic of Michael Vick, both on and off the field, mainly because it’s hard for me to tolerate knuckleheads. But, I want to support him and I did, even in the face of his little indiscretions. When I’d tear him down (which I did, often…he should have been benched at times last year), I never completely closed the door on him, because when he’s on, he’s been unstoppable. I’ve always believed that he could be better than what he’s shown us. I know it probably never came out in anything I wrote, but in personal discussions with people, I defended him when I could. I mean, it’s like the Republicans do with Bush. “Well…he’s our president.”

I guess what it all boils down to is, I don’t want to see him go down like this. Regardless of if he’s cut or traded (a distinct possibility), I just don’t want to see him in handcuffs, on his way to jail. It must be a black thing, because when white players get arrested, I never have a conflict of emotions. Speaking of black and white, I’m sure the white folks in Atlanta are ecstatic, because they’ve wanted to be rid of Vick for the last three years.

I liked Matt Schaub, too, but the fact is Michael Vick’s presence has brought more excitement to Atlanta than any other football player, ever. He is Atlanta’s first football megastar and his tenure in Atlanta is probably the only time that Atlanta has ever been viewed as having a consistently good team. There have been winning seasons in the past, and the Falcons even went to a Super Bowl before Vick. But the Falcons have never been able to shake the label of being a sorry team, even amongst football fans…until Michael Vick came to town. He’s the kind of player that gives Falcons fans a reason to hope for a championship.

And now, it could all be over.

Of course, I don’t wholeheartedly believe that Vick will wind up in jail. I’m sure a deal will be made where someone else will take the fall for him, and they’ll be paid handsomely when they get out of jail. No sense in taking the meal ticket down. What else did you have to do, deadbeat cousin of Michael Vick? It worked for Greg Anderson and Barry Bonds. I know in my heart that there’s $4 million that Bonds is holding for Anderson once he gets out of jail. What’s your price, cousin?