I wrote this since I can't assault my coworker.

There's always that asshole at work who makes everyone else's job harder.  I hate those motherfuckers.

Today, I wound up being in these folks' house until 7:30 because one person at my job didn't even try to do shit right the first time.  And when he was there the first time, he was allocated a full day to get the job done.  He didn't have a full day's worth of work, just a full day's worth of time.  So naturally, he half assed it, which is how a camera gets filled with water.  And who plugs in a camera outside with the criminals, anyway?  When I left, I wanted to smack that dude in the mouth.  And who knows?  It could still happen, because we'll all be at the warehouse in the morning.  Dreams about smacking shitty coworkers are the things that keep us going.

Our jobs are already hard enough without having to clean up after some sorry drag-ass who's just trying to do the bare minimum.  I don't mean just me.  I mean all of us.  Unless our job is something like "Congressman," "porn star," or "professional baseball player," we all have to work hard at our jobs.  And no matter how lowly or lofty our position in life may be, there will always be that one person who deserves to get kicked in the throat for creating more work than they actually do.  You already know who that person is at your job, don't do you?  And even though punching them in the chest until you break all of their ribs would be exhausting, you'd still rather do that than clean up their messes.  If we wanted that, we'd have kids.  And if you already have kids, you probably smack them around for doing this sort of thing.  It's okay, I won't tell the cops, because I encourage that sort of thing.

But sadly, there are all sorts of social norms and LAWS preventing us from bringing violence into the workplace.  And that's just unfair.  These unjust laws are keeping us from teaching terrible people a fucking lesson.  And the lesson should be: "Do your share or get your skull cracked open."  I don't pay taxes so these shiftless layabouts can keep their skulls uncracked.

Don't you realize that if was the 1920s, we'd all be working for some robber baron who'd have armed thugs break our knees for taking a coffee break?  Sure, labor laws have brought us some good things, like our employers having to let us go home at night, and the banning of asbestos, but some things were also lost, like being able to snitch on that slacker who made us have to stay out another three hours.  I know people say that snitching is bad, but you'd snitch everyday if you knew that your snitching going to lead to that sorry asshole getting dragged in the back office some sweet and immediate retribution.  I bet they still have thumbscrews in that office.  That seems like the kind of thing they'd keep in there.

Someone's going to read this and laugh because they know they're that type of person, so if you're laughing at this, you're a piece of shit, and everyone hates you.  They probably don't hate you directly, but everyone you know hates this kind of person, and if they don't, they're just as worthless as you are.  No one wants to pick up after someone else, especially a grown ass man or woman.  I hope someone fills your kidneys with bleach.